Friday 8th September 2006

Had my chemo today, bloods were really good especially the white blood cells.

I did a really woossey thing and cried just before they started....I really didn't want the nurse that called me in, to do it. My 'favourite' nurse was on holiday and it was a male nurse who I hadn't seen before..mind raced and I assumed he was new at it.

I didn't say why I was crying and managed to compose myself fairly quickly. They have to double check every syringe with another nurse and she was a bit impatient with him and when I asked to go to the loo she said oh yes we'll be here for ages yet...I know now that he was just being really thorough, he kept asking if my cannula was ok and that unnerved me a bit as it felt fine until he kept asking.

It wasn't just that, the whole 'chemo' thing makes me feel 'funny' and I shudder at the thought of it. I survived the chemo and felt bad that I'd cried..I think it was also the fact that I hate having it done and I'd had to wait 2hrs to be seen. (No ones fault but you have to wait for the drugs to be made up once the consultation is over).

Had a sleep this afternoon and have just woofed down pizza and garlic bread…obviously not feeling sick.

The Dr said they are having a ‘team meeting’ next week chemo Drs, surgeon and and my care nurse to discuss what the next step should be, so I should have more idea of what’s what next time.

Only one more to go now..thank goodness.

love Clare xx