Have had a lovely weekend.

Saturday was busy, flu jab for Jon and I in the morning.  

Went up to Marlow to meet Tim and Vic for lunch at the Harvester, an hour(ish) in the park after to let Jack run off excess energy and then off to get Jack's pageboy suit fitted.

Sunday we had a bit of a slow start my head was hurting when I woke up, so went back to bed for a while.  I hope it's a one off and tomorrow I'll be ok.

Off to Wendy's for Sunday lunch and as usual it was delicious.  Had to leave at 4.30pm as Jono was off to Boro (his Nanna's funeral tomorrow) and he had to go and pick up Nathaniel from Kent on the way (not on the way at all but hey ho!)

Judith and Gerry called in on their way back from Gloucester and stayed for a couple of hours.

So a busy but nice weekend.

Love Clare xx

At last I have a nominated Macmillan Nurse.  Her name is Ellen and she a lovely very knowledgeable lady.

She took notes on my whole diagnosis since 2006 and medication I'm on.

Has offered to send me leaflets and stuff on available activities at the Macmillan Centre and suggested we may like to go to the Macmillan Hotel in Bournemouth for a short break.

So although I don't feel I need her on a regular basis just now I know that she's only a phone call away if I do need any help or have any questions.  She will also try and get Dr Charlton to get a move on with my life claim..he's had the request since June!

She also suggested that we may like to contact Daisy's Dream so they can talk to Jack...he's already started asking questions and they are much better qualified to help us with him rather than messing up and trying to answer ourselves.  I will ring them next week.

Love Clare xx

On my own tonight as Jono away at Nathaniel's.

Feeling a bit sad actually, doesn't happen often but every now and again it creeps up on me out of the blue.

TV is boring even though we have just had Sky installed there still isn't anything I want to watch.  So I have been listening to music on You Tube.  

I can't believe that I was a carefree 16yr old out and about with friends never breaking the law but on the edge sometimes...and having no idea what the future held, just living for that day.

Just went up to the loo and caught sight of myself in the mirror..how can someone be reduced to looking like I do...it's so cruel.  I look at photos of me not so long ago and it's like a different person I'm looking at.

Not really sure what I'm trying to say but thinking back to my teens/20's is making me sad, I still have most of my friends from back then and of course I now have a lovely little family, so nothing to be sad about really.

I hate this disease and all that it does to you..bloating/baldness/bad stomach/tiredness/breathlessness/dizzy/nausea/anger/short term memory loss/blurry eyes and inability to write neatly!...every medication I take has horrible side effects ...I wouldn't wish cancer on my worst enemy...it's vile!

Love Clare xx

Another treatment over.  Didn't keep my clinic appointment as I have nothing to ask/say and as my consultant was away (again), so thought I'd leave it for another 3 weeks.

Didn't take that long and was out by 10.45am, usual 'Friday Club' having a laugh...me, Charlotte, nurses - Kate, Sandra, Carol.

Charlotte is due her final Herceptin on Dec 9th so it will be great for her to not have to trudge all the way from Newbury but I will be left as sole survivor of 'The Friday Club'...there were several other ladies but all have finished treatment....I'll just have to recruit some newbies as I'll chat to anyone it shouldn't be too hard.

Finally getting Sky back tomorrow after 3yrs without.  Jono is off to Kent to see Nathaniel and Aaron and to go to the football, staying over until Monday.  Hope it won't be too long a weekend on my own with Jack.

We're baking Saturday afternoon (flapjacks and gingerbread men) - Jack's request.  Sunday he has a party to go to and then we'll probably go round my Mum and Dad's as they've been away for a week.

Love Clare xx

Well last night I met up with Fiona a lady from BCpals forum.

We've been chatting for ages on FB and when I had my latest diagnosis she was compelled to come and see me.

All the way from Aberdeen!!!...how fab is that?

Went out for a meal last night and didn't stop chatting all evening, got on like a house on fire.

Today we went to Nirvana Spa.  A lovely relaxing day, still managing to chat.  Fiona had a hot stone massage whilst I just relaxed by the pool, lunch followed (yum) and then in the heated lounger room...I managed to snore as fell asleep...oops!

Hydro pool next and then Floatation...which I loved.

Champers in the Garden Room to finish off.

Jono picked us up at 5pm and my day was complete with the Strictly launch show to pair up the dancers..really looking forward to it this year (always am).

Tomorrow Fiona is coming to lunch..hope my roast lives up to the hype!!

Love Clare xx

Today is the day I meet Fiona Smith.

A lady I have been chatting to on FB and BCpals forum for a few years..

She is coming all the way down from Aberdeen and staying at The Moat House for 3 days.  Tonight we are going to The Walters Arms to have a chat and get to know each other, tomorrow we have booked a whole day at Nirvana Spa.  Sunday she is having roast at my house.

I just know we'll get on as we have same sense of humour and our health situation is similar.

So I will report back as to how the weekend went.

Love Clare xx

So another school year begins.

Y1 for Jack today and he walked up the lane with Megan very nicely indeed.  Pouring with rain mind you but he didn't seem to care.

Yesterday he asked me if he'll get chickenpox again and I said no you normally only get it once and I asked why he was asking.  He said Alice had chickenpox and her Mum died - I have no idea how he's linked the two as they aren't!  I said yes she did but she was very poorly.  End of conversation.

He was upstairs with Jon last night and asked him if I was going to die soon.  I think children know and feel a lot more than we give credit for.

I had a word with him on my own and said that yes I was poorly but not as poorly as Alice's Mum was and that I will not be going anywhere just yet.

So hard to protect them but should they be protected?...I'm not sure either way.

Anyway, enough of that enjoying my first day on my own resting and catching up with a couple of recordings.

Love Clare xx

Another week gone by and I feel good this week.

The school holidays have gone so fast, can't believe that Jack is back to school Tuesday.

Been getting in training for the school run by getting up at 7am with Jon so by Tuesday I should once again be used to early starts...although laying in until 9.30 is lovely.

Had a lovely day with the 'Baby Club' ladies and the kids all played nicely.  So lucky to have been part of a postnatal group that most ended up being really good friends and get so much support from them too.

Iris the funeral celebrant rang tonight to see how I was, I saw her before we went to Spain and she was just checking in...lol...such a lovely lady.

Something on everyday until Monday and that day will be spent very quietly, sorting uniform, ironing on labels, finishing Jack's 'Summer Holiday Diary' and generally chilling.  Swimming for Jack re-starts Monday at 4.30pm so mustn't forget to go to that!!

Just went through school inset days for next year and Jon isn't able to book any...all taken and the only week he can have in the summer is the 1st week of school hols no other full weeks available...so bloody annoying.

He's had his hours changed at work from 8am -5.50pm to 8am to 3.50pm, so now he works 5 days instead of 4 days with a day off.  Much better for helping me and taking Jack to things.  Only took exactly 3mths for his boss to do it...disgraceful if you ask me but I have a laid back placid hubby who just lets things be...I would have been on his case after 2 weeks!!

Anyway, waffle waffle...can't help myself sometimes...

Love Clare xx