Thursday 2nd October 2008

Had an appointment today at the prosthetic clinic….feel really deflated and fed up.

The nurse doing the fitting was so nice and trying her hardest to find one that fitted me so I could go home with my new boob today. It wasn’t happening at all. There must have been at least 100 of the damn things just sitting in their boxes waiting for an owner but not one to fit me.

My bras aren’t right and I now have to go to a specialist shop and get fitted properly (John Lewis got it wrong). My remaining breast is very fleshy and I don’t just mean big, the breast tissue goes on for miles around the actual boob bit (are you following?).

The prosthetic breast should match as near as possible and the ones that do are far too big for the style of bra that I have. So I have to now find time to go to either London, Chichester or Eastleigh and get some new bras sorted out.

They all sell online but what’s the point in that I need to be measured and have a bra fitted with the correct size prosthetic.

Close to tears was how I would describe how I felt as I had hoped to be sporting a lovely new boob tonight (actually I did have a wobble when my Dad asked how it went and had to go to the bathroom and get my head together). The nurse did replace my foam one with a larger one and I do feel a lot better for that.

Having cancer is tough but trying to live everyday as normal as possible is tougher, especially when you are made to feel like some kind of freak because I’m not a regulation 36B/C (the nurse didn’t make me feel like that – my head did)

I also learnt today that a man that was having chemo and radiotherapy the same time as me, has died…only 48yrs old – life is sometimes so crappy.

love Clare xx